reality bites…. so bite back !!

Reality bites ! Yeah I sure don’t need to be told about it… You wouldn’t believe how oftan reality slaped me on the face and bite me in the ass these past few years….. In most cases, confusion, dissapointment, loss of confidence, being unsure and anger follow. Then come the phase of retrospecting, analysing and internalising the lessons learnt.
Reality just bit me once again, not in my ass but closer to the heart. A beginning that I thought was solid & strong turned out to be as fragile as freshly laid turtle eggs (or as fragile as your face skin after a chemical peeling), for reasons that I think is equivalent to pimples on your face: they are not that important to other people, people don’t really care whether you have them, but they annoy the shit outta you because u know that they are there and pimples hurt a lot sometimes (especially when u have strong feelings and connection toward them – lha ga nyambung banget sih LOL)!
And now I am in the confusion, dissapointment, insecurity, unsureness and loss of of confidence mode… I am not angry…. Yet I am very very sad but I just cry when I’m sad, easy solution !
Some people spend wayyy to much time in these phases, they occupied and poison their soul with the unanswered questions, the what if’s etc. Don’t get me wrong, I think these phases are good for the soul, time for mourning and getting ur feelings sorted out is always good. But staying too long in these phases would be major waste of time don’t you think?? Negative actions invite negative reaction…. So when you channel your energy negatively to deal with the harshness of reality, u invite more negative energy and so reality keeps biting your ass until u got no more bump down there !! This is me trying to convince my self to be more positive abt the recent misfortune …. Bleaaghhh….. Having this said, I will allow my self to cry as long as needed but will also look back and try to learn from it… I’m not gonna pretend that I am super strong and not bothered by it, but will not dwell on it either. Shit happens, u learn from it, life goes on ! So I wonder, how long will it take for my heart to recover and move on to bite back reality on its face